Blue Steel

So its Fashion Week in NY and its all the Spring 2008 collections.

Now - for those who know me, I am no fashionista. I principally wear the same 4 colors and variations of the same 5 outfits in a mix of those 4 colors. If I were more of a suitable canvas for fashion I might be more proactive, but taste and common sense are far more important to me than trend, and I honestly don't want to frighten anyone. Kate Hudson can pull off feathers-
I cannot. I know this and I don't tempt the fates by trying. In fact, I think all three would thank me for not. I consider it an act of charity to those around me as well (even though I think I look well in gray).

However, as an art lover and Audrey Hepburn fan

[Audrey Moment *cherubic "aaaaahhhhhssss" ensue*]

I continually find myself drawn to fashion. Its something that can be every lady's art ya know? Expression and self expression are rarely tied up in a neater bow than in the relationship between a runway and an appreciative set of eyes.

As a connoisseur of folly I also find spiced and roasted red meat servings everyday in the Fashion world from my modest, outer window view from the apartment across the street of the Fashion World's meticulously decorated and scented Great and Spacious Mansion.

From what I've gleaned from my Fashion blog feed and the Fug girls and a few slide show inquires via the fantastic Fashion section of the NY times of the designers that I've liked in the past, this Spring is looking like a Camelot Silly time for the silhouette and color spectrum. Even Marc Jacobs (who I adore and would live at his store if I could) was just plain bizarre to me. Maybe I don't know enough about clothes to appreciate things properly, but I do know beautiful and I couldn't see much of that in the clothes at all. It didn't help that 98% of the slide show I was distracted by psychotically back combed and ornamented hair on the models.

Those aren't ribbons and barrettes.Nope. Nope. Nope.I mean... did he know that this wasn't his best effort (because hes epic when it is) so he wanted to distract people from the outfit with odes to Dr. Seuss and things which can understandably be described as "dingle-hoppers" all over the place? I don't know. It just gave me too much of a giggle to not share.

On a happy note though - Rag & Bone had some stuff that I thought was just precious.I would want to wear this with a very Euro pair of dark denim jeans and pointy boots.This just says Sunday drive up the coast with the top down and some Edith Piaf in the changer. I really REALLY liked the slacks but knee length shorts that were really popular this summer (like Rachael Taylor wore in Transformers? with the black heals? Gorgeous.). I think those would go fabulously with this and *bang* garment worthy fashion. Its very very possible.A Regency suit is a joy forever. Its like Jane and Liz Claiborne had a child and it was Rag & Bone Ready to wear Spring 2008.

I wish I was in NY, but not really because its like -30 there right now. All this goodness in one place is almost too much for a girl though. Almost.

Happy Fashion Pancakes

So I have more than a few feeds going into my Google Reader (one of the best inventions for bloggers evah) and one of them is the gloriously snarky Go Fug Yourself.
Now don't get the wrong idea -
It’s a conglomerate of some of my favorite things, complete with brown paper, packages and some strings - IE

sassy women
fashion
celebrities
faux pas
celebrity fashion faux pas
80s TV references
and George

George is the Bastion of Fugmail. Every time he gets a post I not only draw looks from across the office with my stifled snorts, I get glares and the few inevitable "What?....."s. He's flamboyant wit at its best.

This is his latest addition to the Fugmail canon - it was so funny I felt the need to repost.
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When Intern George isn't rubbing our feet, scrawling "Mr. George Fug Girls" on his Trapper Keeper, or peeling grapes that he then feeds us from a silver platter -- as we lounge on our chaises and swoon, "Dahling, WHITHER the fug today, I shall simply PERISH if Mischa Barton doesn't soon leave the house in a Value Village tee!" -- we sometimes let him answer our mail. And today, we decided to let him print some of his answers. We swear on all things holy (so, on George himself) that these are all VERY real e-mails we've received at GFY HQ, with names removed to protect the somewhat innocent.

E-mail #1

Subject line: Not Above The Law

This is to say paris your not above the law !!!!!YOur driving that way and more than one time is pathetic , you could of killed someone and hurt them very badly .Can ya deal with that ????Hope the law gives you the most penalty that can be given , you deserve it totally , no sympathy for you period . And there's no muff for your tiolet seat either , so enjoy that !!!!!!!Get it good !!!!Not a Fan !!!!!!!

Dear Friend,

Playing Sherlock Holmes for a second on this vague, veiled missive, I am sensing feelings of rich disdain. A very wise person once told me, "The sum of your feeling equals the number of exclamation points you use when you're in a wicked strop." Here's a hint: Her name started with "M" and ended in "other Teresa." I thought we'd topped the scale at 14, which were the number she used in a handwritten missive to me raging against the cancellation of Models, Inc., but your 23 push things into the next stratosphere. Such passion! My toes are curling, pet. And you're right, if there's one thing that scaly heiress needs, it's a tiolet seat sans muff. But that doesn't mean I can't knit one for myself...

Getting it good,
G

E-mail #2

Subject line: (none)

hey can u tell amanda bines to stay out of my garbage can thanx

Dear Friend,

I understand your concerns; Anne Heche was once in my garbage can for three weeks. It was awkward, but she wove me potholders out of my old Coffee Bean cups, so how could I begrudge her? I urge you, put on your empathy pants and consider things from your visitor's perspective: Did it ever occur to you there might be a reason Amanda Bynes is in your garbage can? Maybe she was just passing by, and lost an earring. Maybe you threw out a sweater she thought would make a great piece for her clothing line. Maybe she's rooting around to try and find your Social Security Number so that she can steal your identity and run off to Fiji to escape memories of Sydney White. Gosh, maybe she saw an intergalactic wolf-sprite peeking out at her, begging her to return with it to another galaxy and save the world by spawning a new civilization with Andy Dick (although I've heard that before, ahem, ANNE, and it didn't happen, so tread carefully if Amanda tries that old chestnut).

My point is, stretch out your arms and embrace the unknown -- in this case, the reasons a Hollywood starlet is standing on your lawn nape-deep in your trash. There is nothing a hug of curiosity can't answer. But bring noseplugs if you ate fish recently.

Feeling whiffy,
G

E-mail #3

Subject line: words "Go Fug Yourself" sure is a fashion reject

the words "go fug yourself" sure is a a verbal fashion reject. it has very BAD connotation. you probably thought you were oh so cute, but it is a blight on the culture. here you are, pointing out the errors of others, with a blattant business name that is depressing and demeaning.

Dear Friend,

It is? It does? Bless, you sweet peach of knowledge -- I learn so much from reading the GFY e-mail. For instance, I only found out the other day that Britney is just like the rest of us, and that Hilary Duff needs her head shaved by someone who cares. But consider me your knight in shining tuxedo. Once I explain this to the girls, we'll have a renaming summit, going for something that really sends out positive vibes. We'll get all the best cuddle-monkeys in the business together -- David Cassidy, Faye Dunaway, that Verizon guy... It's going to be magnificent. Gird your loins, Officer Sweetpea of the Reject Police, because it's going to set them aflutter and the ensuing round of hugs will shake the smog layer clean out of Los Angeles.

HappyFashionPancakes.com,
G

E-mail #4

Subject line: hi

I am interested in know an famous people do you can help me ? Thanks

Dear Friend,

I can do better than that. I can hold you. I can sate your thirst, and sup on your elixir of yearning for some celebrity sparkle. My name is George. I wear many hats, but my most cherished is the Intern headdress strapped to my grateful cranium every time I get to man the bar at GFY HQ. I cherish sarcasm, pigs, human rights, and silk pillowcases. Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can whiff the world, and it smells like truffles. Hugs are my kryptonite but also my moisturizer. Feel this. Know me. Let's buy each other dinner and then watch it get cold, to remind us that the piece of our hearts we gave to one another lives somewhere else.
I must go. Celebrity Apprentice beckons like a post-coital sandwich.

You're hired,
G
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Rock on George -
Rock on

Bibbity Bobbity Mommy

So this isn't the best picture in the world of my mother but I simply had to take it. I have said for a long time that I think my mother is a faerie or a witch from the Wizarding world posing as muggle for our enrichment. Principally because she warms up every room shes in, leaves every person shes ever met a better person, still has the ability to capture the attention of every man in a 5 mile radius, and knows just about everything to do with anything in the world. Ever. But I also been suspicious because sometimes she has these "I'm not really from here" fashion moments and tonight was one of them.

Its a bit hard to gather from the picture but between our Triple World Plays and "aloof"s I looked up and noticed that my mother had settled down in her queen chair wearing a white cotton under skirt and white knit top with a purple dress with random tye-dyesque flowers here and there that she had only buttoned 3 buttons of, but to polish the outfit she had found half of her Professor Sprout costume that I somehow remember as an old Christmas pageant Shepard's robe that solely consisted of very iridescent stripes of blue, purple and green with a thick gold ribbon border. A sparkly gold ribbon border at that!

And there she was - just considering her "Z's" and "J's". When I finally asked her what was her inspiration for her fashion choice she looked down and realized what she had grabbed out of the closet and we both fell into hysterics for a good 5 minutes. The fact that she had become a real live breathing disco inferno completely hadn't registered. This, for me, compounded the hilarity even more. It was a beautiful moment.

So there she is. My bohemian mom in all her awesome shiny robe glory. I think it was just perfect with her there with all her books, her mane of Celtic priestess hair, eternal smile, and fabulous fashion wonderments. I mean -How fortunate am I?

Answer: very.

And if you think this is something you should taste her cooking...

Mugatu!!!

So I'm a total fashion geek - I've never made a secret of it.

I've read Vogue since I was 12.

I idolize Audrey Hepburn and Coco. I love the stuff!

Being beautiful is a fabulous thing and our natural right as females.

I own it. I love it! Its a good thing I'm not slightly built and wealthy because it would a be a temptation to pay attention to little else. I enjoy anything beautiful and often that comes in a great pair of boots. :D

I've also made no secret that Fall is my FAVORITE fashion season. I just love the colors and lines and hat and scarfs. I adore it all.

AND (can this much wonderful be contained in one blog?!) anyone who has the patience to listen to me diatribe on the subject knows Marc Jacobs is, hands down, my favorite designer. I watched the Fall 2007 women's collection show last night and its made today a lovely distracted day.

These are a few of my favorites that I just have to share. Marc Jacobs has the best and cleanest lines. Hes feminine but the trimmed, non-silly kind of feminine.

See what I mean? But its still fun even though it's so serious. Maybe its the yellow shoes. But he also designs for more than the coat hanger type of body frame. This would be scrumbotious on a very curvy frame. I think so at least.

I really love the long sweater thin belt look (I would choose a pencil skirt with this combo as opposed to shorts though - and those boots probably. Don't want too many right angles). But Marc never tries too hard. He just knows that hes good and lets it go from there. Totally hot I think. And it comes out in the clothes.

I love the Spencer Jacket* line and 3/4 coats and having both of them in one piece - priceless! Can't you just imagine yourself feeling the need to channel Katherine Hepburn in this? I do.

And this just screams Thoroughly Modern Millie tap dance extravaganza to me. I mean, that's what I'd do if I found myself in it. How freaking adorable??!

So yeah - Fall Fashion Rocks. Its like dignified but energized at the same time. Kind of like Autumn in general. I think that's why it's my favorite season all around, not just in the fashion sense.

There are a bunch of others ensembles that I could ogle over but I won't. Few things make me happier and excited than Marc in the Fall.

*they call it a "cropped jacket" but anyone who's anyone and who has seen or read anything Jane Austen knows its a Spencer Jacket. So that's what I call it. Kind of like how in the 50's there were "petal pushers" but when they came back 5 years ago they were "capris". Please - petal push away!