Wednesday Giggles

I love and adore these guys and this sketch. Its a classic. Enjoy

Back Forward Fast

Nick, Loyal, Nickie, Rosie and I got my tree up last night and I had Christmasafied my cute apartment on Sunday (complete with boy choir carols mind you) and I've completed my shopping list and I realized, with all the praises I sang to Thanksgiving, that I had yet to get a proper post done.

And since my head hurts too much from lack of sleep and anxiety to do any real work now seems like an opportune time.

Firstly - On my Thanksgiving;

Thank goodness for fathers that have a bit of sense. About 5 years ago he made a Paterus Familius decision: he infinitely prefers a happy wife on Thanksgiving than a royal spread and a spent and grumpy mommy. The rest of us couldn't agree more. So since then we've gone out for Thanksgiving. It cost less, there is no clean up, you still feel fancy and Mom is always in high spirits.

For the last 3 years or so we've been regulars a the Shiloh Suites Thanksgiving buffet and let me tell ya, we were thankful.

Firstly the live music is always awesome. Fast track to make Liz happy (and thankful) - live music. There is a big screen with the football game and the sound down for those that live for that kind of thing. And the food. OH the food. Growing up with the gourmet that my Bohemian mom is, it takes something special to make all of us go Ooohhh - but the Shiloh pulls it off. The sheer magnitude of the buffet is almost too much. In the main dining room they have a whole wall of desserts. Everything from marzipan petite fours (who was happy? Lizzie that's who. I almost did a happy dance but I contained myself. My heals were far too high) to lemon bars and warm chocolate chip cookies (on a warmer). There is a full on sushi bar with everything sushi imaginable, salad bar with everything salady imaginable, enough fruit to make San Franciscan blush, bagels and lox - the lot. And that is just the cold food.

They open up three whole suites for the hot buffet. There is the traditional Thanksgiving yummyness down the middle of the room with warm bread, honey butter and the works. They even had eggs benedict this year (who was happy? My Father that's who). There was a banana foster bar with a white vested and anxious culinary student ready to make your life banana fostered perfect. There was a pasta bar with an equally anxious and capable culinary student ready to make your life pastalicious. Then there were a couple of sides of cow that were being whittled at by passers by (Who was happy? My brothers- euphorically).

I had fruit and turkey and prayed that the gravy was made with cornstarch and not butter and flour and pretty much the only other thing there whose main ingredient wasn't butter, cream or some other form of happiness was the pasta bar. I think the particular rogue manning the mini frying pans and burners was a bit too amped because he used about 200% too much white wine for the flambe and sent a hurling cloud of smoke all the way through the entire buffet suite when he was working on my fettuccine marinara. It was pretty funny, I'm not going to lie. Official types started poking their heads in asking what was going on because the smoke had made its way through the main lobby and into the main dining room, and there we were. This freckly culinary student holding and pan looking sheepish and me standing as close to the open window as I could and trying not to laugh. The Mater D's face went from totally annoyed to instantly entertained and he started laughing. I was confused but too busy trying to keep my hair smoke free to ask questions. Nick informed me later that Pasta Boy was trying to show off and it back fired (no pun intended) and when the Mater D saw me he understood. I am honestly surprised he still had eyebrows. The flame almost hit the ceiling tile. What a sweet brother huh? Whatever the reason, it was a lovely Caddy Shack moment and sent me giggling proper to our martinellied table.

We were nestled quite comfortably inside the cornucopia of carby happiness with Bob Dylan and Joni Mitchell covers in the background.

We ate and laughed and ate some more. It was my parents, my older brother, Nick and I and it was marvelous. My older brother has been a retail slave for the last 10 years or so and its only been the last 4 months that hes broken free and hence has been able to shake off the Black Friday gloom that usually hovers over Thanksgiving day. I haven't seen him this happy in years and it really made the day that much more amazing.

So we went home expecting the turkey coma and it came surely enough. Four hours later we made our way to see A Bee Movie and it wasn't horrible. It didn't chage my life or leave me in stitches. It was an entirely adequate movie but a wonderful day.

Secondly - On being Thankful;

I am.

For a lot of things

My friend Anastasia and I exchanged a few thoughts on the realtionship that Gratitude, Happiness and Love have. She and I are both reading "Happiness is a Serious Problem" and Dennis Prager says

"Yes, there is a secret to happiness - and it is gratitude. Most of us are grateful for anything we have only after we are threatened with losing it or actually do lose it."

But the more grateful you become the easier it is to be happy and the happier you are the easier it is to love and the more you love the more grateful you become. Its a beautiful cycle and one I hope I can remember better this year.

Because I am grateful.
Very grateful.

Principally for my Family and everything that makes them up

IE:
The Gospel

love

books

laughter

best friends

text messaging

and very silly movies.

There is a myriad of other things; Professors, goddesses, art, the California coastline, new sisters in law, a college degree, a car that works, shoes that fit, people to call, music to love, lip balm, opposible thumbs, computer literacy, day planners, sales at Michaels, Jane Austen, purse size kleenex, Korean pens, farmers markets, contact lenses, blogs and everything else that peppers and colors my life.

At the risk of schmaltz, I am grateful to be me and to have my life and be at liberty to live it and if I can't proclaim that now then when? I mean honestly -

So happy retrospective Thanksgiving. I hope it was more than turkey to you too.

Seriously.

My brother is getting married this week. Its really happening.

Complete with Walmart tablecloths and a 6' sub (yes - they went with a 6' sub. For the reception.... don't get me started)
There is going to be a high of 47 in SLC this whole week..... with some snow and rain thrown in for good measure. On the wedding day even. Totally can't wait. :D
The term "Lizscicle" comes to mind.
Do I even have gloves?

I haven't seen the red skirt I'm supposed to show up and take pictures in.
The place I'm staying at has some stomach flu victims and I have a final 3 hours after I get off the plane on Monday.

Pray for me, Seriously.

I wonder if hes tall...

So Mary S over there on the right pointed me at one of my new favorite blogs.
Now which is also on the right.

He's adorable.
He's brilliant.
He's balanced and endearingly self aware.
He knows who Elizabeth Bennet is.
He's pretty much worth is weight in gold and snobby beer.

Meet Justin

Wednedsay Giggles

One of the Favs. Absolute Favs.
Don't be too put off by the lipstick and heals.

He explains it all earlier in the show and if you're interested I have the DVD.

Eddie Izzard: Stonehenge

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MIA - but only a bit

So its Crunch Time
Fever Pitch Time actually
in terms of writing for Grad School Applications and final projects and a bunch of other things that have a claim on my attentions and writing talents so I will be a bit here and there for the next week or two. I may check in for Wednesday Giggles or if something is particularly fantastic or gets me particularly irate.

So don't miss me too much (all 7 of you)
I'll be back soon enough
~tootles

Sunday Splatdown

The sharp piece of slightly broken plastic on the computer is digging in to my wrist.

I think that I need to trim my nails again. They're getting too long to type with but I want them nice for the wedding. I really hope that things aren't going to implode and then explode in our faces. I really should let April be with all that stuff anyway. I'm sure she has enough things to do and people to please aside of me. Those necklaces were really would have been in Betty Rubble's reject pile. My feet always hurt the day after wearing my black boots. I don't know how I'm going to manage two hours during pictures. Maybe they'll be too cold to tell. I can't imagine being grateful to cold for anything but there you have it. The cold does tighten up the pores nicely though so I suppose I could be grateful for that. If it's too cold though... red noses are every girl's sworn enemy. I've never seen a girl look becoming with one ever.

"You will care very much when your nose swells up"

Noses are entirely one of the funniest body parts. They're just ridiculous in isolation. They're like the bound morphemes of the feature universe. I wonder if Georgie really had one that spread out when she smiled too much. I've been pretty blessed in the nose department. Mom says that Jewish girls get a nose job for their high school gradation present. I thinkthat's a little silly. They have the best nicknames too. Buttons, schnozes, beaks, sniffers. They just move and make noise and have random hairs and are a reluctant indicator of your emotional state. Understanding through leakage.

I wonder why Heavenly Father decided to have tears be an indicator of happiness and sadness. Or of an emotional state and all. I know all the biology - they're one of the fastest ways to expel toxins from stress response hormones and all that but its just strange. This part of your face just randomly leaks and it is the physical expression of the fact that you just can't keep in it all in anymore. I mean - what if our tongues swelled up instead? We'd all give the British a run for their money in the uptight sector I suppose cause that would just be unpleasant.
note to self: Never be without tissue
Contents of purse:
(Or things I don't want to be without either)
pocket knife (that is a pill box, mirror, flashlight, pen, toothpick, sewing kit, perfume holder, with scissors and a nail file too)
make up
sewing kit
clorox wipes
baby wipes
manicure kit
pain killers
toothbrush
toothpaste
flossers
band aids
tea bags
neosporin
cliff bars
sunblock
lotion
tide pen

I really love that new Donna Karan perfume. I better put that on the Christmas List of hopefulness.

Why am I afraid that I'll walk into a men's public restroom so I usually check the ladies room sign two or three times before I go in? New levels of embarrassment there. Of all the things to worry about though...

I wore pearls to church today. I'm one vacuum, husband and corset away from being a 50's housewife. I kind of like those petticoats but the Cold War would have worn on me after awhile. The chauvinism would have worn thin after a while too. But half of me really misses men being men and taking charge. Why is it such a social tight rope for men to be men without being abusive or chauvinists? In the social sense of things. Maybe that new TV show is just all hyperbole. But I sure know it wasn'tTBirds and Pink Ladies either. Oh well - Key Clubs didn't evolve on their own and for no reason. Its the Handmaid's Tale all over. But before it began cause its in the future - Same principles. Same social pendulous effects of stuff, people ,and the greater good

Wouldn't it be funny if there was a back room shot calling CEO named Greater with a spoiled bulldog named Good?

"Didcha ever fly through the air shooting two guns at the same time??!"

I hope the strike ends soon. I don't watch TV regularly but I just don't like writers and the outside world not getting along. It rocks my sense or security about things. As long as people are writing things areOK. We are still somewhat finding our better selves. At least in my Roseville.

Real Love

So just when I think that my family can't get any more amazing my brother goes and proves me bitterly wrong. He decided that I needed his 73GB MacBook far more than he did and proceeded to simply hand it over because my computer got stolen in the break in.

So now I'm officially coming at you from the alabaster world of Mac but I promise not to become "a Mac Person". If it has a keyboard, speakers and a word processing program I am a happy girl. A blessed, amazed, grateful and admittedly slightly spoiled girl.

My Five Life Classes

So my fantastic friend Shell tagged me for another one of these blog adventures.

I'm supposed to devise a list of 5 courses I would take to improve my life.
It’s more fun to be in classes with friends, so include one class from the person who tagged me that I’d also like to take.
Then I'm supposed to tag five friends to go back to school with me.
I am tagging Nicole, Hannah, Rachel, the other Liz - plus anyone else who wants to do it cause I'm truly curious but those are just the regular bloggers I know and would do it if they so choose.

Well first and foremost I would take World Religions & Philosophies 501 with Shell.

But I would call it Understanding 520

Her description sounded like the most delicious class ever.

"I've taken world religion and philosophy both before so I want the advanced course. I want the advanced version of this class. I want field trips to monasteries, Shinto shrines, kaballah centers, Hindu temples, sabbath with a rabbi, visits with theological leaders and religious greats. Schedule seminars, which include a review of major doctrinal beliefs, introduction to scripture, and a question & answer period, with the Dalai Lama, Jehan Begli, Billy Graham, Ecumenical Patriarch Bartholomew, Pres. Gordon Hinckley, Archbishop Williams, Yusuf Motala, Louis Farrakhan, Bishop Tutu, Mary Manin Morrisey, Arun Gandhi, and more Given the religious pursuit that I find myself in, having this class would provide me with the factual information I need and the spiritual experiences I crave."

Shell - I am TOTALLY there with you. And I think we could rock that Tibetan Monk Orange robe ensemble together.

Course #2 - The Mother/Child Relationship 345

But it would be team taught by Bear Grylls, Jane Goodall, Steven Hawking, Theodore Roosevelt, a Shaman named MoonTree and many others. It would be a Survivalist/Naturalist course.

I would learn everything I need to learn, biology, oceanography, cartography etc about 1) how nature works, 2) my relationship to her, and 3) how to survive with her. We would have MANY awesome adventures where Bear would show us how to navigate something and Jane or MoonTree would explain why it is the way it is and outline the layers of life and influence that goes into scaling a waterfall or shark fishing etc. We'd sail and hunt with Orcas in Alaska and shadow elephants in the Serengeti and dive and live on and around the Great Barrier Reef. It will be marvelous.


Course #3 - How to be Financially Secure and not have to Be or deal with Douche Bags 435
I've thought about this and I've reluctantly concluded that to be financially secure you have to either manipulate other people or associate yourself with someone that has no problem manipulating other people and both of those options seems totally unpalatable to me, so I'd like to know how to navigate that particular conundrum. Because one cannot be totally at liberty to write or create if you're too worried about the electric bill or your car getting towed ya know? You kind of need that mental check mark.

Course #4 - Eating with Dairy Allergies 205 (aka "No More Happiness")

I need recipes and ideas on how to get around the American's diet obsession with milk and not end up chewing on celery and pita bred for the rest of my life. Mama needs some flavor people! I just can't get over how either cheese, butter, or cream have a stake in everything we put in our mouths on a regular basis. These are strange waters, I need some help.

Course #5 - Micro Macro Miracles 580

This would be a course where I could learn things that I can do, support and think about in my small daily life that would cause real change in the areas of the world that need the most help. I cannot go over to Darfur and feed all of the 2.5 million starving victims of the genocide that's going on right now. I can't fix that problem by myself but I can do little somethings that will help and I want to know what those are. I already use canvas bags and recycle with gusto to respect the earth as much as I can but I want to help people too and not feel overwhelmed by the fact that I can't do it all. There has got to be SOMETHING ya know?

So there it is. My class schedule. Thats what I would do and were I would be going if I had a chance.

Wednesday Giggles

These guys can just make a heart happy. Especially if you're a music nerd like me.

They met when they were 12 at the Yehudi Menuhin School and the rest has pretty much been history. They stick to touring in Europe for the most part but the second they come to the US I am there with a propeller cap on!!

These two are my favorite bits but there are a bunch more I recommend.

Eye-Rubbingly Pathetic

So I'm one of those slightly manic organized people.
I'll admit it with no scruples whatsoever.

I make lists. I carry lists. I work through lists. I pretty much have, love, and operate through lists.
Some are tangible and some are intangible and one of my important intangible lists is the L's List as previously outlined.

Someone that has a permanent and labeled chair in the Loathe category, right between Political Apathy and Mean Spirited People is Paris Hilton.

The more I hear, see, read or even remotely consider her the more I want to punch a baby.

She makes me embarrassed to be human, female, and American because those are the only things we have in common.

She is seriously everything that is wrong with the human race, Americans, the Upper Class, and painted, bleached, waxed, bulimic, plasticy augmented people.

If you haven't seen the South Park episode "Stupid Spoiled Whore" its Trey and Matt's hilarious ode to Paris and it's the only thing I can think about whenever she comes up. I laugh a little but I still shake my head. Its funny but be forewarned - its an episode that is South Park at its best in a very South Parky South Parkish kind of way.

I read this article today and was having a hard time believing it wasn't on The Onion. I'm pretty sure they heard my eyes roll all the way in Sunnyvale.

What a flaming idiot of a girl. I hate to be hard on my own sex but there you have it.
"We have to get the elephants to stop drinking - that will solve everything"

Dear Paris (or person reading this aloud to Paris because shes only up to G in her alphabet book),

How about getting the hell off of the elephant's land Paris? How about spending your copious amounts of free time and sway with the press to encourage harmonious living in Nature's cross sections? How about endorsing MODERATE LIVING so that the elephants won't need to rampage through villages? That has ripple effect principles you could hang your hat on here in the US as well where we don't necessarily have an encroaching elephant problem but we do have the malignant vacuum of morals in the form drunken people that do just as much intangible damage if not more and then land their whiny cabooses in jail. You should have learned this by now. The alcohol isn't the bloody problem! Its the reasons why they're drinking - both for elephants and for yourself. How about spending 30 seconds and a making a call to your Dad or PR Agent before doing a press release to avoid looking like a pathetically ravingly idiotically sad and hopeless mess of a human being that is SO short sighted she only has a hope for a future as a weather girl that says "its hot".

Get a life Paris
Get an Atlas
Get someone close to you that will be honest with you and isn't intimidated by your hopelessly spoiled character or bank book that will tell you how it is because that's how it is and for that reason only
Get a normal car
Let your hair be it's natural color
Read a book (without pictures preferably)
Go feed the 73 million starving African AIDS orphans instead of judging beauty pageants in Japan
Or call George Clooney and shadow him for a month or two. Now there is a man who has his head on straight and uses his clout for the right reasons in the right way. Help him with raising awareness and funds to prosecute the war crimes in Darfur. And feed the 2.5 million displaced citizens still trying to survive.

Leave the damn elephants alone. If you were visiting I'd get drunk too.

Heartbeats

I watched a movie once.

Amazing I know. Hard to believe but true.

It wasn't on any of the Academy's "To Watch" lists I'm sure but it wasn't horrible.

It was a bit of an estrogen filled story about mitigating bad luck and bad decisions by loving each other. There are many other stories along the same vein - and especially with southern accents and this one was no different.

Most of it was fairly forgettable but there is one dialogue that has stuck with me.

A side character of a single mother with a bunch of kids was desperately looking for a husband and one day found a guy. She thought he was the answer to prayer but it turns out it he was an abusive pedophile. Naturally the mother was beside herself with grief and regret and fear and without any answers. She comes out and sits on the front porch with the main character who is a single mother herself and had been dealt a very difficult deck and she asks

"what do I tell them when they ask why this happened to them?"

and the main character says

"you tell them that our lives can change with every breath we take.
We both know that.
And you tell them to let go of what's gone. 'Cause men like Roger Brisco never win. And tell them to hold on like hell to what they've got--
each other and a mother who would die for them...
and almost did.
You tell them we've all got meanness in us.
But we've got good in us too.
And the only thing worth livin' for is the good.
And that is why we've gotta make sure to pass it on."

I spent this weekend in Salt Lake with my two younger brothers and soon to be sister-in-law doing the last minute stuff for the wedding and doing my best to be a supportive sister. There is still a lot more to do and SO many more changes to come for me and my family. The more I inventory the schedule for the next 10 weeks or so its all I can do to not crawl up in a corner and sing primary songs to myself. And since we've officially adopted Murphy into the fold the more changes we get ready for the more changes we realize we need to make.

Jonathan is getting married

Nick is going on a mission

Chris is probably going to move back to Pasadena

I'm graduating from college

I'm applying to Grad school and desperately awaiting an answer

I might move back home to take care of my empty nested and still ill parents

I'm taking the GRE

I might be a college professor in 5 years (how freaking weird is that??!)

Good things are happening but they are also never going to be the same and I'm beginning to feel the loss.

Valuable experience and things are never easy. Being proven is not a day at the Pier.

But its always easier to talk about or watch a game than actually play one. I'm in the first quarter and feel pretty pooped.

Our lives can change with every breath we take - and that's a good thing.
It lets you love people better and your people love you more.

I guess I'm just doing my best to pass it on.

Wednesday Giggles

A lot happened before Sondra, Denise, Theo, Vanessa, Rudy, Olivia and Jello Pudding -
The sweaters have been around for a while, but not as long as Legos.

Missing the Forest AND the Trees

Dear Thanksgiving,

I just wanted to drop you a note to let you know that I haven't forgotten about you. I know that half of the world and most of the stores therein are already decked out with ornaments, red and green tinsel, and the signs and tents are up for the tree lots, and all just minutes after Halloween, but I have not forgotten about you.

You're my favorite holiday and always have been.

I don't know if I just like to cook, like to feed people, like to be fed, or if my favorite thing in the known universe is being in a spice filled room with people I love, but you are it. I can't help but get happy warm fuzzies at the thought of you.

How can I begin to apologise for Corporate America's insensitivity? I know you're not the most lucrative holiday but President Lincoln wasn't too worried about that when he invented you. He just wanted a war torn country to sit down for a good meal and remember the things that made life worth living, just for a day. I suppose it was the next best thing to teaching everyone yoga but that would have been difficult in those corsets anyway, so he told an ancestral and patriotic story instead. I don't mind that its pretty much made up. It still makes me happy, gives me two days off of school when I most desperately need it, left overs for a week and a few glorious hours with people I love.

You're the real deal Thanksgiving! Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. I'll keep preaching the Thanksgiving gospel and you keep on keeping on.

Your devoted friend,
~Lizzie

Familiar Stranger

I was a bit of an eccentric child.
It was like my heart was always 5 or 6 steps ahead of my head.
I don't think much has changed.

When I was about 8 my mom, as most dutiful cultured mothers did, recorded a movie off of TV. It was HBO's production of The Pirates of Penzance and when I watched it I was completely taken by it. I loved the music. I loved the costumes. I loved Rex Smith's boots and Linda Ronstadts' effortless running scales. I loved Kevin Klein's acrobatics and I loved the painfully obvious fake parrot. I watched it over and over and over again. Any minute of spare TV time had me lost in the poor wandering one's and catlike treads of it all. I was so diligent a fan that it pretty much drove the rest of my siblings insane. Especially when they just wanted to play Zelda. It got to the point that my brother stole the video tape away from me, and after a mad around the house screaming pursuit for my most prized possession, he opened up the flap and totally crumpled up a good portion of the tape. He didn't break it but there was always a delightful snow storm as Angela Lansbury sang about her wrinkles - and I was OK with that.

School and life encroached in on my available TV time so I gradually weaned myself off of it and when I got my first DVD player I was making a list of the movies I felt necessary for my personal library and Pirates of Penzance had a top 10 spot. I located one through the KCET store and stat down for a night of fun with the old friend of a movie that it was. It had been a good 10 years since I'd seen or heard a note of the production. Needless to say, I was very excited.

What followed was one of the most schizophrenic experiences of my life.

Every look and eyelash blink of blocking was totally familiar to me. It was written on my DNA. Every note of every song was a friend. I knew every aspect, dimension and angle of this production but it was a whole new movie. I was watching something I intimately knew, but for the first time. It was a completely different show but the same at the same time. I've never forgotten it.

Goonies was an even stranger experience - Chunk is Jewish! I never knew. It was like I met all of them after knowing them my whole life.

Also when I was a kid there was this hymn we used to sing a lot at church. More than we do now. It was always kind of funny to me because it had the same melody as the merry go round at the local McDonalds so it never felt right, but there was a line that caught my attention, even as a munchkin, and still resonates in me.

Yet oft times a secret something whispered, “You’re a stranger here”
And I felt that I had wandered from a more exalted sphere.

So all of this, coupled with the infinite wisdom of Sesame Street, has been a cornucopia of food for thought for me and left me wondering, honestly child-like wondering about things. Why is something familiar but totally new at the same time? I know that coming back to things with a new set of eyes and experiences and using the vellum of art to make my point is more than a little subjective, but I think there are deeper principles in play. Something much more significant than childhood movies seen with adult eyes.

I've noticed that there are times that something pushes me outside of my normal everyday-living-my-life-frequency and for a moment or two and I feel completely outside of myself. My family has an emotional sepia frame placed on them, some friends reveal themselves to be sheep skin laden opportunists, and nearly everything I turn my mind to seems familiar but disconnected from me. Even the sound of my voice has sometimes seemed foreign.

It doesn't happen often but it slightly haunts me until the next displacement.

I drive the relatively same route to work. I see every shop and person that regularly waits for the bus every day. Twice a day oft times, there and home, but do I know them? No - they're all familiar strangers.

Everything seems to be.
Conversations. The same words from different mouths
Movies. Same jokes in different frames
Meals.
Songs.
the face of my watch

Things usually click back quickly and the sepia lifts but I feel changed. I feel educated and usually kind of sad. But not the defeated kind, just the displaced kind.

In my frequency or out, the sine wave never stops. The music never goes away. And among the handful of things I've honestly learned it's that I've got to belong somewhere; even if it's among familiar strangers.